All I Want Is Your K.I.S.S.

DISCLAIMER: This post may mirror an entry in the diary of a mad Black woman... however, I encourage you NOT to take this personally! This exhale is simply drawn from the gutteral of my experiences and those of my friends. Today was just the day that the frustration came to a head.

Please understand that NOT ALL MEN fall into the category of this rant, and I will be the first to profess that THERE ARE GREAT MEN IN THIS WORLD! I know MANY of them, so there is no doubt in my mind about that fact; and thus, this does not apply to those. However... for boo-boo the fool and his entourage of nitwits... I dedicate this piece to you :)

Men, I encourage you to K.I.S.S.... and no, I don't mean the act of juicy lip-locking! I mean KEEP IT SIMPLE STUPID!

For the life of me, I will never understand why the Adams of our existence choose to lie... constantly... consistently... without a fleeting thought, reserve or hesistation. By chance, did they learn LIES as a second language when they were little? Or maybe it's just a "golden rule" outlined in the infamous "Playa's Handbook" that really only exists in the recesses of their twisted minds. Either way, WHERESOEVER they learned it, they need to make like a computer, DELETE the program, REBOOT and UPLOAD some COMMON DAMN SENSE!

I am NOT bitter...

I am simply expressing "spirited" disdain at the tom-foolery that SOME men think adds to their swag. (Enter Ghetto Girl, Boomshika --->), "YOU AIN'T SLICK, FOO'! I peeped yo' game long fo' you EVA opened yo' mouf!"... and that's what men don't realize... WE SEE YOU! 

Those who choose not to K.I.S.S. are walking, breathing RED FLAGS! Your billboard shines from miles away, and when you approach us, PLEASE BELIEVE that we've already read the writing on the wall; however, most times we give you the benefit of the doubt just to see if you'll prove us wrong and project a different message. Sometimes that works... but most times you're only proving to us that we're NOT dyslexic!

So, how do you K.I.S.S.? BY TELLING THE TRUTH! Yes, truth hurts sometimes, but when given tactfully, no one can ever fault you for not keeping it real! Understand that TRUTH is the precursor to TRUST, and if we don't have trust, we have NOTHING! Here are some helpful tips that I can only HOPE you'll take heed to:

When you're asked if you're single, K.I.S.S.! - Be truthful about your situation and allow the woman to make her OWN decision on how to move forward with you! Don't let the shock of your wife and 10 kids be her inspiration to buy a gun! MMmmkay?!

When you've forgotten an anniversary, birthday, or special occaision, K.I.S.S.! - You ever heard, "Better late than never?" Well, that applies here! A lot of people don't even trip when it comes to stuff like that, especially if you have a good relationship/friendship, but AT LEAST be truthful about your moment of amnesia. It's faaaaaar better to stomach than telling a story that clearly came out of left field!

When you're asked if you're ready to make a commitment, K.I.S.S.! - Don't give the hope of a relationship if you're only willing to COMMIT TO SEX! Going out on dates is a HUGE part of courting a woman you're truly interested in committing to. But if your idea of getting "out and about" only involves the travel time between your house to hers, she already knows you're on booty duty! BE HONEST with your intentions and save both of you from the embarassment and disappointment!

Really, I could go on all day long, but I'm sure you get my drift. I had to address this because my experiences with men these last couple of months have been absolutely BAFFLING! So, if this frustrated rant of mine can help somebody in the process of exhaling, so be it.

Now, let me go find somebody who wants to K.I.S.S. me! LOL